“This is what the LORD says: ‘When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my gracious promise to bring you back to this place. For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’” (Jeremiah 29:10-11).
1997 …………………………………………………………………………………….2008
On the front end of things, I couldn’t have known…couldn’t have fathomed how it all would go. I simply walked it. One foot in front of the other until I found myself face to face with the man I now call husband.
Eleven years have passed since that hot July afternoon when Billy took me as his bride and my two sons as his own. If I had only known then what I know now I would have…
fought less for control.
accepted personality quirks as normal.
blessed instead of criticized.
admitted my wrong without needing to be right.
loved “as is” instead of loving when fixed.
praised his heart before picking it weary.
prayed for him instead of praying for God to change him.
showed more affection in front of the kids.
showed more affection behind closed doors.
made more of his good intentions instead of expecting perfection.
Yes, if I had known then what I know now, I would have been a better wife on the front end. But on the front end, I didn’t know how to be a better wife. In fact, I’m not sure I even believed we would get to this day—the backside of eleven years. The only thing I did know on July 19, 1997, was a simple faith that breathed with a little hope that love would carry us all into a better future.
It has. Love has covered a multitude of sins and selfish to bleed a truer red into the hearts of the family I call mine. Only by the gracious grace of God have we arrived from our years of captive living to know a spacious and breathing joy that delights in the journey of a “two as one” kind of yoking.
We fit…Billy and me. To those on the outside looking in, it may seem an odd fit. There are times when it felt strangely peculiar to me as well. But these days, our love wraps like a favorite quilt—comfortable and perfectly molded to the shape beneath its layers. God has given us our layers. I see them now, and I am thankful for the strength they harbor. They will carry us into the next season of loving one another.
Tonight, we sit on opposite sides of the equator. I don’t know if he is thinking about me, but I am thinking about him. Thinking about the back side of eleven years and how grateful I am to God for dreaming some dreams for me that included a young preacher man named Billy.
As a people in search for a better tomorrow, we are prone to contextualizing Jeremiah 29:11 for our seasons yet to come. Rightly so. But in our searching for the next best promise, I wonder how many of us take the occasion to frame this verse within the context of our seasons past? To look back one, five, ten, even eleven years ago and think about the hopes and dreams that our Father seeded on our behalf?
I’m living some of those dreams now. I bet you are too. Problem is, we didn’t see them on the front end. And what is often unseen rarely breeds our thankfulness. Rather than acknowledging the fulfilled promises that reside in our current, we busy ourselves with our “yet to be.” Our now is not enough, but our next? Well, surely it holds the milk and honey and prospering plans of our Jeremiah 29:11, God.
This is faulty thinking. Not because it’s not true. It is. There is still so much more to come—more plans, more dreams, more hopes, and more forever. But now—this day—we are living and breathing the milk and honey of some long ago planted promises. Our now pulses with the cultivated seed of yesterday’s sacred sowing. God is forever tending to our soil and bringing to fruition his plans for our lives. His tending is rooted in a lavish and unprecedented love. Because of his love, we know the love of others.
And tonight, I am thankful for the love of a man who has faithfully loved me for over eleven years. We share the seeded hope that God planted on our behalf on the front end of a hot, July afternoon.
July is still hot, my friends. And my marriage?
On fire…
for one another and for God’s magnificent schemes for our life together!
So tonight, dear husband, I tell you again, that I do. I will. I promise, for as long as God allows us this side of eternity. You cannot read my words on our special day. It doesn’t matter. Some things simply need to be spoken even when continents preclude the listening. May our Father carry the love of my heart to yours in those Bolivian mountains as you rest. Dream dreams for our tomorrow, and breathe thankfulness for our today. We have come to the backside of our eleven years.
If I had only known then, what I know now…
I’d still say yes.
I love you. And so I pray,
Thank you Father, for dreaming Billy and for allowing me the joy to dream him also. He is your lavish expression of love to me. Keep us Father, close to your hands and your heart. Give us sense enough to allow you your molding and your vision over our lives. Teach us how to love better, and grow us in our understanding of your purpose for marriage. Thank you for dreams that come on the front end of our experiences and for the dreams you seed this day. Grow us Father, into the likeness of those dreams until we taste the full measure of your sacred intention. Amen.
Happy Anniversary, Elaine. Our society needs models of good marriages. It is the one relationship that God chose to illustrate the relationship between God and the Church.
So may God continue to infuse you both with His love to spill over on to all you touch with healing grace.
Happy Anniversary, sweet friend. This moved me to tears that won’t stop flowing. First, in the stinging familiarity of some of those same mistakes, but then out of joy in the beautiful place God has brought your marriage. He has used your message to tenderly remind me today all He has done in mine, as well. I rejoice with you and Billy.
Blessings,
Tracy
This was a beautiful tribute and I thank you for sharing. God had so many dreams for me – things I could never have conceived in my hopes for the future. His dreams were better than any I could have had for myself. I met my husband in March, 1964. I knew I loved him immediately but what I didn’t know was that God put the perfect man for me right in front of my face. I was 17 and could only see that moment. Thanks be to God that He can see ahead of the moment. Blessings, marlene
thank you…your perspective is AWESOME and just what i needed!
Lovely post….Happy Anniversary!!
Such a sweet tender post today! Happy Anniversary! I hope you have many, many more years”in the yoke” with Bro. Billy!
I can share so many of your sentiments about my own marriage of 35 years! So very many things that I wish I had done different or better. But God’s grace and love covered a multitude of sins for me and love won out.
Love the “then and now” pictures you posted!
Your friend in Mississippi,
Marilyn
What a lovely post, and such a powerful affirmation of marriage!
Terry and I are approaching number 42, and I’m still scratching my head as I attempt to figure out where all those years went.
Be blessed, and may the next 11, and the 11 after those, and then the 11 after those … be as blessed and smoldering as are these 11!
Kathleen
Elaine:
Peace for the journey seems so fitting as you are looking at the backside of eleven, doesn’t it? ;0)
Dream dreams, GOD DREAMS….HUGE because He is huge and He loves to show Himself strong in our day to day lives. I also pray not only for my own marriage but for yours also, that you and I would never, ever, never, ever….kill the passion that our MEN have.
Love to you,
Yolanda
It is from the back-side of twenty-five that I send my congratulations. In fact, I leave with my sweetheart next week for a special trip he’s planned just for me. My heart is in danger of spontaneous combustion. :o)
Your words about Jeremiah 29:11 spoke volumes to me this day; indeed we ARE celebrating seeds of promise well-sown so many years ago. Oh Glory to God. And again I say GLORY.
Happy Anniversary my new friend,
Joyfully,
Melinda
Happy Anniversary, Elaine. You are SO blessed. May God forgive me right in this moment for the envy in my heart.
I like your perspective of Jer. 29:11. Today is part of that hope for a future that we looked toward years back. Yet, my “today” not being as I desired but rather pain-filled, I cling to Jer. 29:11 for the hope of better tomorrows.
Oh, what a sweet post! I love that you and Billy fit… and that your love wraps like a favorite quilt… and that you are on fire for him! Happy Anniversary! Thank you for this post. It makes me want to love my husband better today!
Much love,
Angie xoxo
Happy Anniversary to you and Billy. I KNOW he is thinking of you! On the backside of 11 and the front side of 25! 🙂
God Bless both of you as you celebrate (even though on different continents) what God has brought together. Marriage takes three to be complete! You,Billy and God! Oh what the future brightly holds for the two of you and your family.
Love to you!
K
…We share the seeded hope that God planted on our behalf on the front end of a hot, July afternoon.
Happy Anniversary Elaine!
I pray for many more hopes and dreams as you wait upon the Lord.
His has everything all planned out, and it’s always GOOD!
Blessings my friend♥
thanks for sharing…
and thank you God for covering us…
He does take on our anxieties and wraps us in peace when we let go.
The older i’m getting the harder my sleep is becoming, too.
my sister and i used to pray with each other before falling asleep, and that little prayer still comforts me on nights I have trouble…
good night…sleep tight
pleasant dreams…same to you
God bless…
and then we would begin the myriad of names, family, friends, dogs, birds, and then invariably one of us would fall asleep while reciting names…
sweet memories
🙂
Happy Anniversary Elaine & Billy!
What a beautiful love story and self evaluation! Your words are woven together with love and growing! I'm glad Christ united the two of you and you grew together and bonded a whole family!
May you keep the fire kindled & glowing for years to me! Love your photos! Congratulations!!!Double…
for this and your winning..surprise
Happy anniversary!
Happy Anniversary, Elaine.
I loved the words you chose to speak of God and your Beloved.
Jeremiah 29:11 is a verse that God recently gave to Shannon and me right before things at his job happened that caused us to tremble, He was one step ahead with that verse to calm our fears.
To give us His Words to cling to….to simply give us hope.
I like your thoughts though too, of looking back through our 17 years of marriage at all the times this same verse has been true before in our lives.
You and your dear hubby and your sons are blessed. And all of us that read your blog are blessed to know you and share in you and your family’s walk with God.
God Bless,
Amy:)
Bless you Elaine for your inspiring response to KEYS for UNITY..a towel & basin…Praise GOD!
Yeahhhhh…and turn up those TUNES & Point of GRACE!!! I'm hearing the Glorious songs already!!!!
Thank you & congrats! Peggy
I'm out of this "desert"…but I still loved reading your series!
This "HOT" desert temps are too high for travels! Lord, keep the fresh anointing in the fresh breeze passing through here!!!
Happy Anniversary! Praise Jesus for redeeming lives and marriages to make us a living example of Himself to those around us.
Blessings~
How wonderfully romantic! It is so satisfying to read and hear about the real love…. the marriages that have been given over to God… again and again. Thanks for sharing!
Oh Elaine~I loved that!AND Happy Anniversary! What a sweet blessing!
Yes, we would all do more to be the “wife” we should be—or at least I know I would! (I was a mess!!)
LOVE you girl!
You will never know how much this has blessed me tonight. Thank you.
Happy Anniversary,
Love & prayers,
Joy
Elaine,
What a beautiful tribute to your one true love. When he gets home, oh what a blessing that will be.
We have a bit in common. We were both married in 1997. This November it will be our eleventh wedding anniversary…and my husband received my two children with open arms. My daughter was six and my son was three when we married.
God has made all things new in our life. Of that I am so grateful.
Blessings, Joanne
I’m, late reading this but I wanted to still comment. I think you guys are just precious. I lvoe that you said your marriage is on fire. That is awesome. Congrats and may the next 11 be as “hot” as the first 11.
wifeforthejourney
my post is six days late because I´ve been nowhere near a PC ´till today. Unable to reach you over the divide of miles and limited technology, you have been on my mind more than you know. Thank you for your gift of grace these eleven years, especially for these ten days apart.
Your cards (smuggled into Bolivia with the help of our youth pastor and his wife) have found me at a time I cannot remember being more vulnerable to the movement of God.
I have been sick, as have several other members of our team. There have been lessons in our illness, and I have read and reread your letters through it all. Much better now, and Nick has been untouched by disease but instead much handled and used by God.
I am counting the hours till our homecoming which IS being delayed about four hours by a change in our flight home. We are flying first to Santa Cruz Bolivia BEFORE going to Miami – can´t be helped, at least we are coming home!
Sorry I can´t be on the Hotel PC longer, lots of people waiting.
love to Colton , Jadon and the Princess, “The King and Crown Prince” (aka Billy and Nick) are on their way home to you!
love Billy
“But now—this day—we are living and breathing the milk and honey of some long ago planted promises. Our now pulses with the cultivated seed of yesterday’s sacred sowing.”
I love this—what an amazing truth that we so often overlook when the times get hard.
Love the pictures too!
Beautiful. I too wish I would’ve known your list on the front end.
Happy Anniversary!
I see I’ve missed a ton on your blog while we were on vacation. Hope to spend some time catching up in the next couple days.
Thinking of you!
Tiffany
Beautiful! I was just thanking God this morning for keeping my feet placed in my marriage when I wanted to walk out – I would have missed out on what I'm enjoying now in my marriage with my best friend, my husband.