My Surrender

My Surrender

“For the eyes of the LORD range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.” (2 Chronicles 16:9a).

Some days you get the Audience you’re after.


Some days you receive the inconceivable light of heaven in a way that allows you a glimpse of a Father’s astounding glory.

Some days your spirit runs in the freedom of a hard fought surrender.

Today was one of those days for me.

There has been a laying down of some dreams, my friends. A profound moment of clarity that has come to my soul and one that is rarely allowed by the flesh. But this flesh is tired and weary of the pursuit. Not of the dream, but of thinking that it has to blow in the direction of my well-intentioned breath. It doesn’t have to. Not anymore. That is the beauty of surrender. It frees the heart to live in the dreams of a holier wind that breathes with a better intent.

I have tasted this deep clarity twice before. But their witness awaits another day. Today’s witness belongs to an early morning altar christened by the willing tears of sacrifice. They still flow—these tears of mine. No longer sad, but rather as sweet and cleansing and with the joy of the resurrection that follows a sacred dying.

I don’t write my thoughts this night to push the envelope with my Father…to micro-manage a favorable end to the story. I write it here because my Father has already pushed the envelope with me, and he desires to be the one to manage my end in his favor.

I chronicle this point in my journey with you because there are some things–some points of worship and surrender in our lives–that need the witness of words. Why?

Because after an altar’s bow, there always comes a day when God moves on our behalf in a more perfect direction. And when that happens, we can come back to our stone of remembrance and cry out the words of the prophet Samuel…

“Thus far has the LORD helped us.” (1 Samuel 7:12).

The Lord has helped me. It matters not the sacrifice. What matters is the peace that has arrived with the letting go. God has brought me to the end of my striving, and today I raise my Ebenezer in praise knowing that new seeds—sacred seeds—have been planted within the soil of this heart.

I punctuated my soul’s stir with an early morning run. The sky was clouded with grey, yet my heart was filled with the praise of release. The first song that cycled through my IPOD was the one embedded below. As the chorus echoed deep within my soul and through these lips, the clouds broke, and I received the Audience that I was after.


I like to think that there was something about my song that caught the attention of heaven and her King. He’s certainly caught mine, and so I pray…

You, my Father, are my amazing Best. You have strengthened my heart for the journey this day. My heart…my today, tomorrow, and my rest belong to you. Whatever you choose to do with my surrender is your choice, not mine. Humbly and with the heart of joyful release, I commit to the road of your forever. It’s yours to navigate. Bring me safely home to you. Amen.

~elaine

Thank you for allowing me to share my heart this night. We will return with our final “Zoo Pondering” sometime this weekend. And if you think about it, I sure would appreciate your prayers for the workteam returning tomorrow from Bolivia. They won’t be home until the early morning hours on Sunday. Shalom!

18 Responses to My Surrender

  1. Thanks for sharing this Elaine. The Lord gave you a beautiful song for this moment. Rejoicing in your sacred surrender.

    Praying for the team travelling home and for your reunion.
    Keep believing,
    Joy

  2. Thank you Elaine for sharing this tonight. I can “Relate” (oh, the devotion went really good tonight…God’s fingerprints were all over it) to you… thank you for reminding me that I too need to surrender those dreams I’ve been grieving over. I found out some things last night and my heart began to pour out to Him again. This morning I woke up and again asked God to help me learn to be content….He provide and saw me through another day.

    I’ll keep your guys and the team in my prayers. Let us know of their safe return. I know you can’t wait to see them!

  3. Boy do I know how hard times of surrender can be….but oh the peace and joy that follows.
    Moments like these are the moments we look back on when the road gets a little wearisome.
    I haven’t been around in awhile…but we are at a resting place for awhile…so I will enjoy being able to come by and catch up.

  4. Elaine,

    Wow…surrender is the bottom line, the foundation that the Lord must build upon.

    Your words touched me tonight. I was beginning to feel the weight of much committment in my life and thanks to your spirit-led post, will now pray that there will be no striving, only full surrender to His will, His plan for me, no matter the cost.

    Just the thought of surrender is quite freeing.

    Blessings, Joanne

  5. Your words are beautiful as is your heart for following the will of our God.

    I can so relate to the laying down of a dream – the surrender and the release.

    And the peaceful praise that follows.

  6. Elaine,

    Total Surrender! How hard it is to do that sometimes because we want to control the situation. Especially ones like you and me. HA! Blessings my friend. I have been praying for our team and for their safe trip home. See you tomorrow. Love you!

  7. “That is the beauty of surrender. It frees the heart to live in the dreams of a holier wind that breathes with a better intent.”

    What a powerful word picture! You gotta love that holy wind because – instead of blowing us around and to bits – it actually moves us intentionally to the ground you describe here.

    I am mindful of that other wind, the one that consumed the frightened waiters we see huddled in the upper room in the Book of Acts. No doubt they are shouting “Amen!” as they read this piece too. Fierce courage and utter resolve comes with such a wind.

    Kathleen

  8. Such a sweet place to arrive. Once you get there, don’t you always wonder at what took so long? I know I do. Being yeilded and able to rest in Him is the best possible place to be, but getting there is sure a struggle at times for our human hearts.

    Rejoicing with you as well for the blessings the team has encountered and the ways you’ve been connected to what God was doing even when you weren’t aware of!

  9. Beautiful words… amazing truth.

    Elaine thank you for sharing this very vulnerable and tender time with all of us.

    I’m looking forward to hearing what happens next. Breathe in each moment… God’s presence is right there with You in such a mighty way right now.

  10. great post, my friend! Praying everyone is home safe and sound by now…singing praises to the Lord for all He is doing!!

    (I tagged you over at my place, friend! No pressure, but if you have time I’d love to read your responses!!)

  11. Dear Sis – it is so important to chronicle the “authenticity” of who we are… I thank you for your surrender… I know that it touches the lives of far more than you would ever imagine. By agreeing with God on this… you are saying yes to something far better… far reaching… and I rejoice now for what you have done.

  12. Thank you for sharing this personal moment of surrender…what a witness to me. Know that my prayers continue, for you, and the team returning home.

    I was so happy to see that you’ve received the cd! Thanks for letting me know! I’m excited to think how the Lord might encourage and bless you in what you hear.

    Blessings, sweet friend.
    Tracy

  13. I enjoyed reading this too. Thankyou for your comment on my blog:) God is very good to us. I’m sure you have had a blessed reunion with your husband and son:)

    I do love living in the Smokies! When I do make the hour drive or so to Pigeon Forge and Gatlinburg, I love driving through the state park and Cades Cove. Oh, and you haven’t lived unless you’ve been to Dollywood:) Country theme park at it’s best:)

    I also read about your views against the religion of evolution and I have a great resource that I’ve found on that subject: Answersingenesis.org. The founder’s organization just built and opened a sizable Creation Museum in northern KY that my husband and I went to for our 2nd Anniversary.

    Love in CHRIST, have a blessed day!

    katiegfromtennessee

  14. You are a dear for posting so many comments on my blog. I did have a lovely retreat and this post of surrender reminds me of it. I’m always needing to review and rebuild my altar. The enemy likes to taunt me with my struggle to lay it down once and for all. But, the daily Christian walk often requires a daily surrender as my flesh wants to argue. My retreat contained that again. Thank you for your friendship through this blogging world. Your poetic words are difficult to respond to but I am reading and listening…and the Spirit moves.

  15. Oh Elaine, how I can relate to Sacred Surrender. Mine happened on a mountaintop. And yes, the tears were not tears of sadness, but tears of pure joy and peace. I know now that God is truly glorified in the dreams He had for me!
    God bless you sweet friend. I am going to catch up w/ your Zoo posts. My life has been a “zoo” as of late.
    K

  16. Elaine,
    Beautiful words of truth. I have had a recent surrender in my heart and what a blessing to read the words you shared about surrender. It brings peace,freedom,rest,joy,when we surrender to Christ. Thank you!
    Our move to Rocky Mount is Aug. 13.
    God has blessed us so and continues to hold us in the palm of his mighty hand. I am looking forward to meeting you in person. I wish I had contacted you at She Speaks however it was such a busy time esp. with my daughter there at Next Generation. She thankfully was constantly sharing with me when she saw me. Many Blessings! Fran Westlund

  17. wifeforthejourney:

    Sharing in surrender; that’s what I want. Being home is good, but being in submission to the Lord is what I need to become most attached too.

    Love, Billy

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